The day i committed a crime.

Theres no other way of expressing my sorrows and frustration of not being able to 拜年(visiting relatives for festive greetings) lest to say the exasperating coughing fits that breaks in whenever i speak. The ushering of the rooster year may have brought some of us much happiness and ang baos but all i got was that dollop of feathers stuck in my throat. Despite missing out on 2 days of holiday, i still had to attend lessons. Drats! And as usual, bolts of coughing during lectures and tutorials. Oh well, the doc said it was ok since it was only dry cough so i am still fit to attend lessons. Well, nothing wrong right?

And what you are about to read next is going to be shocking but absolutely factual. No dramatising involved.

I got shot for coughing! Straight in my face. "Stop it!"

Don't worry if you dont know what's going on cos i had no idea then too.

My tutor blurted out the 2 words at me like I was attempting murder.

Not only me but my friends and the people around us were flabbergasted.

It then dawned on me that he was referring to my coughing.

I tried my very best to explain to him i wasn't playing punk by coughing on purpose; dishing out my meds & a back-up MC to verify the genuity of my health condition. All he did was just shoved everything i said aside and continued his rollercoaster speech mixed with soft and hard tones; gunning me down with his bullets of latent anguish and hate. Speechless. I was marked and facing execution for coughing.

I couldnt take it any longer and tried again to explain how i wasnt trying to disturb his class and my coughing was unintentional. Then came the high rise of emotions. He stepped back and waved his hands as if i was some major germ ball trying to infect him. His face crumpled and hinted a crying expression. Yupz, the look on his face was pricelessss. And like a combo meal, came the priceless quote "Don't do that again. I have a phobia and if you do that i will run at the speed of light and never talk to you again." Woah, that sentence was top quality stuff for a superb comedy flick but at that moment, it was confusing. Nope, you wouldnt want to laugh especially when it came from an old man armed with an encyclopedia of facial emotions.

Ok, so i had to submit. After all i didnt want to seem as if i was trying to bully an old man. I tried to plea for mitigation though deep down i know i had done nothing wrong. Nods, sincere eye contact and adjusting my body language to show submissiveness. You cant fight back higher authority I guess. The most demanding task was to control my cough. I knew if i were to let out even a tiny weeny bit of a coughing sound, that bubble of peace-talk would just shatter and ignite another fusillade. Point is he wouldnt listen to my explanation and so what's the point? Anyway, i think there was no need for another call of a priceless facial expression yah?

Then came another climax. He made a proposition. Either i change class or "stop it and cooperate" with him. Ok, deciphering that quote would mean to stop playing punk and quit coughing. Arghz. Someone just arrest me and throw me in jail cos i cant suppress my coughing no more. As i tried hard to calm the intense atmosphere with my cajoling; not forgetting downing lots of water to wet that constantly parched throat, i sensed the demons of hatred charging at me right from the mouth of Mr Priceless. It was indeed a mastery considering the fact that he could inflict such an oblitering blow at my soft heart without showing any hint of anguish on his face. You know a master when you see one. Finally, he was "convinced" and "satisfied" with his "victory" and walked away.

My friends and I knew that this unique commotion was worth analysing and as worthy engineers-to-be, we should examine the cause of it. Here is the post-mortem:

1. Mr Priceless was extremely unhappy with our requests for changing our groupings for project work during our first lesson. This unhappiness built up over time and became latent anguish.

(But in the first place, he asked the class if we were ok with his initial arrangement and thinking that since our request was a very simple one: swapping the names, i.e student #4 switch place with student #5, we initiated the request.)

2. Following the change in grouping, he invited more trouble by asking us openly in class if we were satisfied with the change. That spurred on more requests from other groups for changes. That could have made Mr Priceless even more frustrated and he could have conveniently directed the blame on us for causing him such a calamity.

3. Mr Priceless obviously doesnt like changes and likes to play everything by the book. His own way and his own ideas. No grounds for compromising. Hence, he doesnt listen to students' explanation and ideas very well. Not only does this applies to me, everyone else in class is included. A guy in class was asked to "clean up his cpu" (deciphering: wake up his idea) when he merely asked Mr Priceless for help on his project. Tactless.

4. Mr Priceless has an extremely odd phobia of people coughing around him. Ok that is pretty evident already but if you are still unconvinced, he deducted one mark from my project for coughing when he was asessing my group. He blatantly said "10 marks but since you cough, minus one mark". No joking.

As engineers-to-be, my friends and I had to resolve the problem and we went to look for someone who could helped us. After all, where was student welfare? Where were the teaching ethics? Didnt confucius said 有教无类 (regardless of who you are, everyone deserves to be taught)? We were doing it no longer on a personal note but for the benefit of the whole student cohort. After explaining to the person-in-charge, he told us he would settle the problem.

Next thing we know, while on the way back home, still recovering from shock, Mr Priceless called my friend (also my project partner) and asked us to talk things out on the coming monday.

Showdown? Or another series of priceless facial emotions? I wonder if i can recover over the weekend or else adrian the germ ball will definitely create history for making Mr Priceless run at the speed of light.

A Tribute to the great Master a.k.a Mr Priceless.

Priceless by Incubus

The fact that you
You think you can
Speak to me
The way you do
It bleeds me to believe that you
Have never stepped out of the skin you lived within
And then, and if
This day occurs
Your tongue, the taste
Will imitate a battery
The anti-equilibrium
Your stomach becomes the floor
The look on your face was priceless!
The look on your face was priceless!
Yes, the look on your face was priceless!
That look, it was...